An Ode to OveryΒ 

A few years ago, on a chilly morning, I sat in a queue at the Verulam licensing department. On my right was my mom and to my left was a guy – attractive but in a way that is unapproachable – and his father next to him. Somehow, we got talking, he was far from being unapproachable. In fact, he let me skip ahead of him. 

This is no love story, granted he is everything a girl would want (athletic; outdoorsy; has nice hands and snakes; is respectful) – but this is simply how I met a person who intrigues me to this day. 

He embodied traits that I wanted to adopt. I wanted to be active, and go on adventures. I wanted to be exciting. 

I found myself doing more and living fully – I had always wanted to surf, but something held me back. Would anything hold him back from something he wanted to do? Nope. If no one wanted to join, he’d do it himself. And slowly, I became even more independent and less afraid to do things on my own. I am now fiercely independent with the confidence to do things on my own.
 
Sometimes, we don’t realize that it’s the people we meet who influence us more than we care to admit, even in the briefest interactions.  

Today, we went for a “walk” – and a walk with him could mean anything from a casual stroll to a full blown hike. I was smart and wore sneakers. 


As you can see… I took photos. 


I found that I’m always connected to my cell phone. He chooses to have nothing on him, he is present in conversations and he experiences everything – even casual walks on the beach. In fact, he takes feeling seriously and ditched his slops. 
For whatever reason I had my cell phone on me, I had a different experience – I worried about getting it wet or falling. I was distracted at times. Luckily for me, I am aware of my flaws, and attaching my phone to me as if it’s another limb is a flaw. I tell myself it’s because I like to capture moments, this is true, but sometimes moments are there to be felt and remembered. 

In 2017, when we take photos and capture moments, is it really for us or is it for others to like and admire / envy our lives? 

When I asked him why he doesn’t post his amazing photos on social media, he simply said that his photos are for himself. 

So, thanks Aidan. Thanks for a unique friendship and lessons. 

Logging off… πŸ“΄

What turns you on?Β 

For me, it’s smarts. It’s knowledge, expertise and the readiness to learn. 

 
My best friends are smart; my boyfriend is a genius; my peers are experts in their fields; the people I follow on Twitter are smart – they don’t spam my feed with links to news sites or politics, they’re able to formulate witty and sometimes cheeky or cynical tweets. 

I like being around people who are intellectually stimulating, and yes, I’m an intellectual snob. If you don’t have depth or cannot impart any information on me, I won’t waste your time or my time, and shouldn’t we all be as selective?
Smarts don’t necessarily mean degrees or diplomas or phD’s… (Mere titles that cost $$$$$ – always remember that you can read books and do the research while not having registered to a formal programme). And while having degrees to your name and a voluminous reservoir of textbook knowledge is great, a curious mind and a willingness to explore and learn is what I’m talking about. 

Thinking doesn’t strain your brain. We think all the time – but if we gossip 24/7 and focus all our brainpower on the Kardashians, for example, we’re dumbing down. 

Intelligence is sexy. Read a novel, watch the news, choose a random topic and do some fun research… Learn. Grow. Train your brain to get the best out of it. You will become more interesting and more confident, people will gravitate towards you. It’s happened to me. I’ve outgrown many friendships simply by improving myself and I’ve found it to be so rewarding. 

Still not convinced that intelligence is sexy? Remember, a woman’s orgasm starts at her brain. 

Project duplicate

If I can afford to splurge on myself, I can afford to help someone else out in a little way.Β 

This is my personal project that I have committed to.

What this means is that for every self indulgent splurge I make on myself, I will spend money on someone who deserves it. For example: I purchased a new pair of shoes (I always splurge on shoes because I do not compromise my comfort), and while I am in no financial position to splurge on a pair of shoes for someone else, I did buy a pair of reasonably priced shoes for someone who had old, torn shoes. He was grateful and I felt good. Maybe I do this for my ego, but if so, so what? I get a high from improving lives, even if its a small gesture like buying a pair of shoes for someone.

Last week, I paid my varsity fees (using my mom’s credit card) and while this is not a “splurge” I realized how lucky and privileged I am as I do not to worry about finances or paying for my education. Unfortunately, education is a luxury for many. This led me to contact a local primary school (public) and ask for a the names of any students who had outstanding fees because they could not afford it, there were 3 names – the children had been defaulting for years and the school had no choice but to hand them over to debt collectors, *insert Sasha* I decided to give their parents one less thing to worry about this year and paid the outstanding balances – anonymously, from my own pocket (not my mom’s credit card). This made me feel good too, even though the beneficiaries have no idea who I am.

Like Joey says, there is no selfless good deed

K-Bomb

Allow me to introduce you to my friend, Kyle. He’s a handsome, well-mannered guy who works hard. Sometimes he turns to a bucket of chicken wings to help him deal with life’s stresses. He also has a great sense of humour and doesn’t mind this blog post.

Each week, I am bestowed with a voice note from Kyle, of what has annoyed him, it is not the usual whining, but the funniest string of swear words one can think of. He goes off like a loaded shotgun, and there is nothing that entertains me more.

His latest issue (which I have heard many times) regards KFC – the glorious fast food chain.  He loves them, the chicken is delicious and their crispy coats have consoled him during the tough times and celebrated his successes with him during the good times. He has tried to stay away but the separation anxiety overwhelmed him. Alas, he sacrificed his chiseled abs for them. That’s love.

The problem however, is always being asked if he would like to donate R2 to the their CSI initiative to aid homeless kids. Kyle thinks that is a load of crap, KFC should use a % of their profits to make a substantial donation, and not take his money especially since he has already bought all the fried chicken he can fit onto the backseat of his car, he has made a worthy contribution to the survival of the franchise and now they want MORE? How dare they?! Greedy bastards.

Now throw in queues, road rage and snobby staff and we have the K-Bomb.

Fuckthemfuckthatfuckfuckfuckitfoolsfuckingidiots

(un)loved

“When your love is pure or spiritual, there is no demand, no expectation. There is only the sweetest feeling of spontaneous oneness with the human being or beings concerned.”

– Sri Chinmoy

 

 

I have felt wanted, I have felt needed, but never have I felt loved. Until now. It is a glorious feeling,  and I am grateful.