Allow me to introduce you to my friend, Kyle. He’s a handsome, well-mannered guy who works hard. Sometimes he turns to a bucket of chicken wings to help him deal with life’s stresses. He also has a great sense of humour and doesn’t mind this blog post.

Each week, I am bestowed with a voice note from Kyle, of what has annoyed him, it is not the usual whining, but the funniest string of swear words one can think of. He goes off like a loaded shotgun, and there is nothing that entertains me more.

His latest issue (which I have heard many times) regards KFC – the glorious fast food chain.  He loves them, the chicken is delicious and their crispy coats have consoled him during the tough times and celebrated his successes with him during the good times. He has tried to stay away but the separation anxiety overwhelmed him. Alas, he sacrificed his chiseled abs for them. That’s love.

The problem however, is always being asked if he would like to donate R2 to the their CSI initiative to aid homeless kids. Kyle thinks that is a load of crap, KFC should use a % of their profits to make a substantial donation, and not take his money especially since he has already bought all the fried chicken he can fit onto the backseat of his car, he has made a worthy contribution to the survival of the franchise and now they want MORE? How dare they?! Greedy bastards.

Now throw in queues, road rage and snobby staff and we have the K-Bomb.



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